OK, to be honest, I don't really have such ill feelings towards Allison. The assignment in class was to write about a monster, and I just couldn't think of anything else.

Allison the Monster

Last year, around January, I met a girl who lived about twenty minutes away from me. I didn't know it then, but she would become one of the most influential people in my life to this date. I met her innocently enough on a dreadfully average night, when a friend gave me her screen name. We talked until 4 in the morning that night about all her problems. Unknown to me at the time: that would be most of what we always talked about. In a few weeks I went over to her house and met her. She immediately made me think that she was in love with me and I did things with her that I should not have. After a few more visits with her she decided that she didn't want to see me that way anymore and we would just be friends. I believed her. Slowly I started convincing myself that I was in love with her. I even started believing that she too was in love with me and if I gave it enough time she would realize her error and love me once again. Throughout the months I continued talking with her and helping her with all her problems. She never listened to mine and one night went over the top. I was telling her how I felt when she told me she was tired of hearing my 'bullshit'. It made me feel so bad to hear that she really didn't care about me the way I though she had. I wrote her an email telling her that I couldn't keep up this mockery of a friendship anymore. For a while she seemed ok with that, but a week later I received a desperate email telling me how much she missed me. I have so far remained strong in not replying to her. My nine month ordeal had finally come to an end.
She was not a monster or dragon in the traditional sense. From her serpentine lips came not fire but lies. Her claws did not scratch and rip apart my flesh, but my soul. She did not steal life, only joy. She was a monster of the mind. Manipulating and lying to me to get her way. Detaching myself and breaking free from her is one of the hardest and most important things I have ever had to do in my life. There have been times where I thought I might be too weak to continue. Times I have wanted to give up and going crawling back. Fortunately, my resolution has remained firm. I am proud of myself for it and my friends are proud of me too. The monster called Alison shall haunt me no more.
In some ways monsters like Allison are harder to defeat than the run of the mill boogie man. For defeating a monster like Allison requires looking deep inside yourself and wrestling with your own mind. The threat is hidden. In Beowulf, the monster was right in front of him. He could see the dragon. He knew that he had to slay it. He had an unwavering purpose and he knew what the right thing to do was. The monsters we deal with every day are craftier. The ideal solution is not always so easy to see.

-Adam
9-16-03

Back To Random Writings
Home